Dear Mum,

How are you feeling? I wanted to take a moment to remind you that you are doing your best during this unprecedented pandemic. Of course, this definition of “best” is incomparable to that of anyone else’s, because you come with your own personality, skills, experiences, qualities, and authenticity. 

As a result, you will always be more than enough even when you do not feel it. I was hoping to remind you of something that is often not mentioned and you do not receive enough credit for: It’s the invisible work you do to keep the home running, and it is something that you have had to do a lot more of since the start of this pandemic. 

It’s the small things that are actually a pretty big deal and which without, would detriment the  flow of the household. It is the alarm clock you set for 5:45 AM and wake up to promptly  because you know your child has to use the restroom exactly twice before they decide to take ten minutes to be convinced that the Spiderman costume is not a school uniform. 

Read also: Dear Mum: Stressed out, school is starting edition

Mama, it’s you rushing to the kitchen before your kids come running down because you know each child has a different pallet and you are ready to meet their requests to ensure they are satisfied and content. It could be that you are also doing this while on a conference call for work. 

It is the fact that you are able to note the exact moment the toilet paper has run out, and you are able to stock up before your kids notice – and perhaps, before you have to get ready for your evening class as a graduate student. Perhaps, it is that you have gone back to work and your kids have gone back to school, so you wake up extra early to prepare their day and quickly get ready for your own. Then, you come back home exhausted but ready to give them all the love they need. 

You don’t just console your child when they have fallen or bumped their head, you understand the exact way they need to be emotionally supported in order for them to feel better and enjoy the rest of their day. 

It is the unconditional love you give your child who is not feeling well, and the sleep you forego to make sure that they are as comfortable as they can be at night. It could be that you are a first time mum with a new human being that is dependent on you, so you unknowingly dedicate all of your time to understanding why they are crying a certain way, how to feed them, and the best manner to put them to sleep.

“Your role is life-changing, irreplaceable, incredibly valuable, and is a large reason why the universe keeps going”

While doing this, you have sacrificed showers, used a large amount of dry shampoo, cried after everyone has fallen asleep, and come up with a coffee routine to keep you going. 

These are just a few examples of how everything you do as a full-time mum is the reason everyone else in the household is able to get through their day. During this pandemic, you have had to take on so many roles to ensure the unexpected change is something your family is able to get through. Your role is life-changing, irreplaceable, incredibly valuable, and is a large reason why the universe keeps going. 

I know your days can be tiring, worrisome, and sometimes super long but they’re also filled with silver linings that you often provide your kids. 

These memorable moments could be tickles that make them erupt into infectious laughter, a good grade that your child thanks you for after finding creative ways to teach them geometry at home, or the relief your baby feels after you find a solution for their colic. 

Read also: Surviving the pandemic as a full time teacher, PhD student and a mother of four

You do this without expecting anything in return.

I feel you, mum. Everything you do for everyone else is to ensure that they are content. You push through even though there are ups and downs, unexpected challenges, and moments that leave you feeling exhausted. You’re doing your best to get through this pandemic on a more positive note, and that is something that is absolutely amazing. 

I see you, Mum. Your best is incomparable to that of anyone else. 

Kind Regards,
Chereen 

Chereen Shurafa is a Doha based community counsellor, writer, and certified change coach. She is the founder of “Dear Chereen”, an online platform dedicated to mindfulness, mental health, and inspiration.

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